If something feels off this holiday season, it's probably your conversations.
You're stuck in under-stimulating chats that you'd rather not be part of. And that's a problem.
To help you out, I made this scale.
Share the scale with your friends and family. Decide where you want to hang out. And stay there.
Operate on a higher level, where possibilities are endless and no one cares about the weather or where Janet next door is going on her holidays.
LEVELS OF CHAT
Level 10: Wonder
Big questions that stretch understanding. Thought experiments. What might be unknowable. Ideas not limited by current reality.
Level 9: Exploration
Trying things out. Playing with ideas. Running experiments in life, work, or thinking. Testing possibilities and seeing what happens.
Level 8: Truth-seeking
Examining what is actually going on. Assumptions, incentives, trade-offs, uncomfortable or unfashionable ideas. Finding purpose without needing certainty.
Level 7: Inner world
How things feel internally. Fears, desires, contradictions, motivation, confidence, and energy.
Level 6: Sense-making
Connecting dots across experiences and ideas. Reflecting, reframing, and understanding patterns rather than reacting.
Level 5: Function
Logistics, tasks, coordination, life admin, necessary talk that keeps life moving.
Level 4: Consensus reality
Agreed-upon facts, dominant narratives, current conditions, the version of reality most people are responding to.
Level 3: Noise
Mass-consumed entertainment and spectacle. Television, sport, celebrity stories, viral moments, shared culture absorbed passively.
Level 2: Judgement
Commentary about people. Opinions, gossip, criticism, comparison, social positioning, who did what and why.
Level 1: Filler
Weather, pleasantries, default scripts, and automatic conversation patterns followed without thought.
Which level are you hanging out in?
Where does the best version of you operate?
Who brings you 7-10 and who drags you down to 1-3?
Big ideas: yes please. Small talk: no thanks.
(and happy freeeaking new year 💙)
