About those years

I spent 11 to 21 losing myself.

High heels. Dyed hair. Pretending to be stupid because boys liked me more that way. Hiding my muscles because I thought I was too big. Thinking before I spoke. Doing the things I thought I should do, wearing the things I thought I should wear.

Push-up bras.

All of it performance. All of it for someone else's version of me.

Finding myself looked different.

Not thinking before I speak. Letting others down rather than letting myself down. Doing the thing that felt right even when it was unpopular. Having empathy without making it my job to manage everyone else's emotions.

Not caring what anyone thought.

The kid you were before school got hold of you is probably who you actually are.

The decade I lost trying to fit in is gone. The decade I spent finding who I actually am?

Worth every awkward moment, every friendship that didn't survive, every time someone looked at me like I'd changed.

I had.

If you're somewhere in the middle of that journey, it's not comfortable. Shedding masks never is. But the version of you on the other side of it is the one you were always supposed to be.

Be more you.